5 longreads for your weekend
🎂 It’s August 2, which means happy birthday to Charli XCX and James Baldwin, who would have been 100 years old today.
Issue #133: how to say no, how to do nothing, and the psychology of luck
By Harris Sockel
Here are five longreads for your weekend. You’ll find deep cuts from the Medium archive plus stories published just last week.
Among 33 tips for living, working, and thinking from bestselling author Ryan Holiday, this one stood out to me: the most polite way to say no is just to say you have a rule. For example: “I have a rule that I don’t decide on the phone.” It’s a graceful way to decline without making someone feel bad.
Saying (and doing) nothing goes against some of the most powerful forces in our culture (make content! have an opinion! subscribe!). It’s a powerful act of rebellion. In the words of French philosopher Gilles Deleuze, via artist Jenny Odell: “what a relief to have nothing to say, the right to say nothing, because only then is there a chance of framing the rare, and ever rarer, thing that might be worth saying.”
“It’s disturbing to live in a city where 911 takes so long to pick up, where the cops don’t show up for days,” writes Jennifer Pahlka in this maddening essay about a home invasion in Oakland. When police arrived 48 hours late, one of them said to her: “You have every right to be angry at us. You should yell at me” (she didn’t). Pahlka elaborates on her viral X thread about the incident; she knows the perpetrator needs mental health services but our government isn’t set up to give them to him.
A lesson from Paul Ford, whose guide to modern etiquette is one of the most charming essays I’ve ever read: When you meet a stranger at a party, see how long you can wait before asking what their job is. And if you do ask? Respond “Wow, that sounds hard!” no matter what they say.
Here’s the most-read piece of short fiction ever published on Medium: Rafael Zoehler’s “When I’m Gone.” I’m not convinced this story wasn’t designed in a hermetically sealed lab with the goal of making people cry (just look at the comments!). The narrator’s dad dies and leaves him a series of sealed letters. In the words of one reader, “What an amazing piece of writing. Love the idea, which is executed with simplicity, clarity, and beauty.”
🍀 Your daily dose of practical wisdom: on the psychology of luck
Multiple psych studies over the last decade have found that simply believing you’re lucky — whether or not luck even exists! — can influence your actions and their outcomes in a positive way, probably because it calms you down and gives you slightly more confidence.
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Edited and produced by Scott Lamb & Carly Rose Gillis
Questions, feedback, or story suggestions? Email us: tips@medium.com
